Timing is Everything!

It's almost the end of the year and i look back and I have to admit this was one of the toughest years for me as an adult. Many great things happened and l overcame many obstacles through a dedicated persistence. As the past year was ending my goals and dreams were overshadowed by the occasional doubt and second-guessing myself.

However miraculously I overcame all the obstacles and am filled with hope and promise for a successful 2009. Since my birthday in October three very important people all wrote me a card or letter that said "2009 is your year". Those that know me know that l read between the lines and seeing as those three people are barely connected it means thats the universe telling me 2009 will be a year where all my blood and sweat will be rewarded.

The biggest mistiming of the year was Bless By Bless Couture was supposed to be in stores for Christmas but due the economy, delays in production and me being overwhelmed this didn't happen. At first as expected I was down in spirits, I was discouraged, I felt like I had worked hard for this all year only to fail at my goal. I had printed 100 catalogs that were supposed to be mailed to stores, buyers, stylists around the country and I didn't open the box for three weeks, it was too late to catch the holiday shopping season.

As December approached I began to receive phones calls and emails from people asking how they could buy BBB gear for the holidays. The requests were so overwhelming I all of sudden realized that it didn't matter that I had missed the holiday season goal. My mission is to design and create a product that will carry my message of hope, faith and love through the people who purchase it. Apparently I was doing my job because people wanted my clothing regardless, so what more could I ask for? Life is about timing and my time is 2009, that's what I have decided and that is when I will make it my time. As we journey through life we are presented with situations and challenges that sometimes make us feel we have failed and yet when you are able to know our time and place and accept it we realize we are doing just fine.

Every time you cross the street the only reason you make it across without being hit by a car is timing, on most occasions we cross the street seconds away from a serious injury or death, that is just how important timing is. It is important to know when it is time to do, say or act. Going to work is all about time, what time you get there what time you leave determines your pay. I think you would agree with me that life is all timing.

Here is a little story I was told as a kid and it stuck with me, i would like to share it with everybody. There was a man of great faith who lived with his family in a little village. It was him, his wife and their three kids. He was known around town for his dedication to his religion, his kindness and his unwavering belief in God.

One day a storm came and for seven days and nights it rained heavily and the little village, which stood next to a great river, began to flood. The man gathered his family in his living room and they sat on tables for the floor was covered in water and he began praying. 'God please stop these heavy rains and spare me and my family" he prayed with his arms spread towards the heavens. A group of neighbors knocked at his door and they yelled out "Please come with us, they say the rains are getting worse, we are all leaving the village". The man yelled back at them "God will save us! We are not going anywhere!" the neighbors tried a few times and left.

The next morning the man and his family where sitting on the kitchen table for the waters had risen a few more feet. He was repeating his prayer asking God to save him. A group of people in a little boat that was floating by his house yelled through the kitchen window "Come with us we have room for you and your family, we can get you to dry land before the rains get worse'. Again the stubborn man yelled back "Thank you but God will save us! We are not going anywhere!"

Few hours later the man was praying his prayer for help with him and his entire family on the roof, for the waters had risen as he had been warned. A loud noise in the sky drowned his prayers and he looked up, he was sure God had answered his prayers, the calvary is over he thought. To his dismay he looked up only to see a helicopter with a man lowering a rope and yelling for him and his family to climb up to safety. Again the man refused yelling "God will save us! We are not going anywhere!".

The rains continued as warned, the flood rose washing the man and his family off the roof and they all died. Soon the man stood before God and he was furious as he asked God "Why did you forsake me? I spent my entire life worshiping you, serving you and spreading your word. Why didn't you save me, I had faith, I put my trust and family in your hands and you let us die!" God looked at the man and said back to him "It was you that let your family die. You asked me to save you so l sent your neighbors, l sent a boat and l even sent a helicopter. What else did you want me to do?"

The lesson is in life if we understand the timing and the reality of what is given or taken away from us, we will realize we have all the answers right in our hands. People and things come in our lives for a reason and they also leave for a reason and it is important that when they come we accept them at the right time or let them go at the right time.

I am writing about timing because of the many personal things that are currently going on in my life that have forced me to sit down and learn and accept the concept of time so l can better cope and have faith. I recently realized that in love things are perfect when two people realize what they are worth to each other at the same time. So often we find that by the time we really care or love something or someone it has gone and it is too late. Like that man despite all his faith we complicate things and fail to realize that what we need and want is offered to us over and over and yet we look elsewhere to find answers or solutions.

Anyway, I just wanted to share the importance of realizing what we are offered by the universe, by God, by friends, by loved ones and even by enemies. It is important to know miracles when they happen, to know angels when they walk into our lives and also to know evil so we can walk away.

So learn to say the right things at the right time, learn to walk away at the right time, learn to laugh at the right time, learn to thank at the right time and and most of all learn to love at the right time. When you learn to pay attention to the time and importance of what life is giving you, everything becomes so simple and it is then that you can say...

"I love you, I thank you, I appreciate or I am leaving, I deserve better..."

Speaking of time, it's time for me to get back to work so i can catch the UPS man to ship some orders :)

B

www.blessbybless.com
Hope! Faith! Love!

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Angel With No Wings

In September 1994 when I was attending Montserrat College of Art a series of very fortunate events took place and changed my life forever. With my roughly 8000 miles away I had discovered a different meaning to the word alone. On the most part I was used to being alone but this time was different, instead of being alone with 100 other kids all my college mates would go home for the holidays.

Thanksgiving was the first major holiday I experienced, the day before I remember watching everyone get excited, packing their bags bragging of how they would eat themselves into a comma. After all most of these college kids had left home for the first time and eating 15 cent Ramen Noodle every night and being away from their homes was a new thing. I didn't really mind it, Zimbabwean boarding school food was not exactly gourmet. In fact I was happy to be able to have so many choices when I walked down the grocery isle; Ramen Noodles, chicken wings, Chef Boyardee, Spaghetti with sauce, all of which I could buy with a $1. I knew this food was not gourmet either but
i could deal with not one complaint.

One day i checked my bank card and realized I had $60 left to my name, now that doesn't sound too bad BUT......I had no job, no real friends yet, no family for 8000 miles. Now that was a scary feeling. I woke up the next day and walked to the beginning of a main street in Beverly called Cabot street and started filling out applications in every single business I could. Some of my experiences were very discouraging because there were not a lot of minorities in this city at this time, a few times i was denied application forms. An hour later I walked into a bakery which was filled with all kinds of bread and sweet pastries, it was very cosy and intimate and a little lady greeted me and asked "Can I help you?". I told her I was looking for a job and she went out back and came back with a tall middle aged man with peppered hair and a dirty white apron on. I tell him i am looking for a job and he asks me about my accent because I still had a strong British/African influence on the way I spoke. As soon as i told him "Zimbabwe, Africa" he got over excited and took off telling me how felt he has been an animal in past life. He told me about his dreams of feeding wild animals, the birds that circles his house every summer and how it was a sign that I had walked into his store, he hired me on the spot. I didn't know what to think, I do know the average person would call him crazy but i understand what he meant, there was an energy, he just went a little bit far and personal with it :).
Anyway i am forever grateful to that man for he gave my first job, he respect me, he saved me from a difficult time and most of all, of all the places I walked into he was the only person who saw my color and origin as a good thing. In fact he saw my origin as something to get excited about, he asked me about elephants, giraffes and so on.
Weird he was but I prefer to call him different and open...He was my first angel.

My second angel was the Resident Assistant at the college who knew i was a fish out of water in this country and always came by to chat and ask me how i was doing. He would invite me to his place and he would could and tell me I needed to toughen up because i was to pleasant and around here that can be dangerous. I would tell him of my dreams because my first month in country i had recurring nightmares and the one that remains vivid in my memory was of a 6 month old baby covered in blood that i would try pick up and help and it would attack me. I could never get myself to hurt the baby even though it would hurt me continuously until I wake up in fright and out of breath. We talked about many things that helped me in a time where I had no one to talk to or to listen.

So back to the bakery, because that's where it all started. On my first day at work I was introduced to a kid my age who was to show me how things worked on the job. Once we were alone in the back he started out training session by saying " There are two ways of doing things here, the right way and my way". So he gave me an example and showed me how after sweeping the floor the right was was getting the dust pan and his way was sweeping the dirt under the walk in refrigerator. "American style" is what he called his technique. He would also work his entire shift with his then girlfriend waiting in his car and when i asked why he would do this or why she would wait, again he said "American stlye". Believe it or not this guy would turn out to be my third angel, I would not of guessed it either at this point.

So on Thanksgiving day in 1994 "Mr. American Style" fascinated by how I had never seen or been to a football game decided to take me with him to a high school game. Before the game I we stopped at his house where i met his mother. He introduced me to her and ran upstairs and left us alone, I was very uncomfortable but she was so pleasant and warm I relaxed. After offering me food or drink both of which I refused she asked me a few questions about myself. I remember responding "yes ma'am, no ma'am to everything" I was still not used to the first name basis or not using Mr. or Mrs when addressing adults. Then before we left she whispered that i was the most polite kid he had ever brought home and she hoped we would remain friends. Here energy towards me was comforting and she was the second person that had not judged me or shown any discomfort or distance because of my skin color, she felt my energy, liked it and nothing else mattered.

That was over fourteen years ago and yesterday I had a lovely Thanksgiving dinner at Mr American Style's new house with his wife, his 14 month old son and his family. Since 1994 there has not been a birthday, holiday or special day that him and his mother have not done something special for me. And yes, his mother is my fourth angel. Yesterday while driving, after leaving his house, I got overwhelmed by the fact that I don't ever remember sitting at a dinner table with my mother, father and siblings. Tears started rolling down my cheeks, I never do well on holidays for it makes me sad that no matter what I do in my life there will never be a day where I will sit with my entire family or just my parents at a table and laugh, share food and feel grateful for having each other. That train passed and will never return. I don't wallow in a fact that i cannot changed but when i see people that really strangers take me into their home I am filled with joy and gratitude but i am also reminded of what i lack.

My fourth angel gave me a mother, something i yearned for since I was separated from my own. I speak to my real mother every other day, we share a close spiritual and emotional bond but our relationship for now is reduced to phone calls and dreams. My fourth angel Denise is a mother i can hug, I can kiss and one i can tell my problems and know she will not only care, but she will help. Every time I look at her I am in disbelief of the reality of what she has done, given me and continues to be for me.

A few weeks back she was diagnosed with cancer on her lung. After about a 5 hour surgery, a broken rib and a loss of 5 quarts of blood she is cancer free and getting ready for chemotherapy. When l walked into the hospital after her surgery and say he laying there weak and in pain, I realized I had never really told her how she has affected my life and how she is my angel - insane as it may sound. I am forever grateful for my friend "brother" Mike and his entire family for being the biggest part of my ability to cope without my family. I have encountered many angels in my life before and after the ones I have mentioned but at this moment these are the ones that are on my mind at this time of the year.

Unfortunately I had to get reminded by cancer the importance of what i have in my life but I am happy for what God has done for me and continues to do for me in every path i cross. We all have angels with no wings and sometimes we don't know the difference and don't take the time be crazy enough to realize what they are.

In honor of my angel without wings #4 i designed a t-shirt to thank her and to
rejoice her poise and optimism even when laid out in a hospital bed after being cut open, cut on the lung, hooked to machines with a broken rib. M.D the invincible!
Here is the design.




Thanks for all your support!

Bless
Bless By Bless Couture
Designer
www.blessbybless.com

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For The Cure

I am proud to announce that the t-shirt i designed for the breast cancer cause is now on sale.
over 60% of the profits from the sale of each t-shirt will be donated to Susan G. Komen For The Cure, a great foundation dedicated to finding the cure for breast cancer. As I mentioned in my last post, the passion and commitment of this charity is unparalleled.

The t-shirt is made of extra soft combed Egyptian cotton and feels like a second skin. It's a long and trendy design with extra long cuffs and waist for that fashionable look. The shirts are available in small, medium and large.

HELP THE MILLIONS OF WOMEN & MEN AFFECTED BY BREAST CANCER WITH YOUR PURCHASE.





Click here to see details or buy the shirt

Thanks for all your support!

Bless
Bless By Bless Couture
Designer
www.blessbybless.com

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Birthday Excitement

October has been a great month and although it started slow, it is ending full of hope and promise. My birthday was October 17th, a day i spent rejoicing the wonderful life that I have lived and continue to live and improve daily.

The birthday culture has spoiled us all with the birthday being a day where we look around expecting gifts, phone calls and pampering from loved ones. This year I thought of reversing this default way of thinking because of a funny incident that happened with my mother. I called her the day before my birthday and she asked me "Tomorrow is your birthday right?". After I confirmed she then asked "So what are you betting me for your birthday?". I laughed so hard and responded that it is her that should be buying me something and she had a very interesting response. She told me she gave me life and every birthday I should be celebrating all the gifts and Blessings I was given not asking for more...

From now on my birthday will be a day of giving and gratitude, I will reach out to the special people in my life and thank them for their love. It's not like i was ever a selfish sulking "it's my birthday what you gonna get me type of person" but i think the day you were born is a good day to rejoice your life and to thank those who have made it special. So to everyone who has supported me or loved me,
THANK YOU! I LOVE YOU BACK!

So on my birthday i decided to ask my mother a few questions about the day i was born. she told she was feeling the contractions on a Thursday night and was in so much pain but could not go to the hospital because it was during the war and there was a 6pm curfew. Which meant no civilians were allowed on the public streets after 6pm. People had to stay in their homes from 6pm until 6am the next morning. She suffered the whole night and at 6am a neighbor who had a car carried her to the hospital and by 8am she was holding a little baby boy, me :).

My father had been away at work as usual, between working in a mine in another country he had opened up a little store that was hours away from home where he sometimes stayed. One day when I have a child I hope i can be there when he or she is born, that would be too special to miss.

Another thing about October is that it is breast cancer month. Tomorrow I am showcasing my line at a charity event 'Fashionably Pink" to raise money for Susan G. Komen For The Cure - an organization so passionate about their cause. if you are not familiar with Susan G. Komen For The Cure please visit their website and read the story of a woman who lost her sister to breast cancer and started the organization in her name, so inspiring. I related to this organization so much that I was honored to be a part of this event, I share the same passion for charity that they do and it was so fitting. Thanks to my friend Tracy for the idea I also ended getting to actually design a custom T-Shirt for Susan G. Komen For The Cure to help raise money for them. So I am proud to show you the Bless By Bless Couture Susan G. Komen For The Cure 'We are fighters!" Breast Cancer t-Shirt. Whew that was a long name for it haha.



I spent a lot of time wondering what i was going to do for a design until it hit me, I had to draw something. I felt a hand drawn image would make it feel personal and fitting for the cause and the passion both the foundation and l shared for charity. So I draw a pencil sketch of a heart with an arrow, this represented both the love (the heart) and the fight (the arrow) that Susan G. Komen represents. I was happy with the outcome and they were thrilled.

If you would like to support the breast cancer cause please buy one of these t-shirts, $10 from each shirt is donated directly to Susan G. Komen For The Cure. The t-shirts will be for sale on October 27th on www.blessbybless.com.

Okay that's it for now, happy birthday to me and a sincere thank you to all of you for reading this and for supporting me. My goal for my 33rd birthday was to give and hopefully this design will keep giving with your help.

Love B
Designer Bless By Bless Couture
www.blessbybless.com

Hope! Faith! Love!

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Lessons ....

Hi again! Yes I am back after a month or so hiatus.

A few months back I sign on to create and produce an event for local charities from the two places I call home, Boston and Mutoko, Zimbabwe. I came up with this great plan to create a black tie event where people could come and dance, drink, laugh and give in the name of charity.

When I started planning the event I thought it would be easy I would have numerous people to help me and we would all work tirelessly and create a great event and raise tonnes of money. two weeks before the event I found myself sitting in the office alone, with hardly any sponsorships and absolutely no tickets sold. At first i panicked and felt very overwhelmed, I even went through a few moments of bitter resentment at how all my loved ones had not offered their help.

Then as I always do I jumped out of my skin for a few minutes and realized we all have things to do, we all have dreams, we all have problems and obstacles. With that realization I understood that all he people I was expecting to help probably were sitting somewhere alone thinking to themselves "where are all my loved ones when i need them?" To top it off as usual i was also guilty of not having specifically asked any of them "Can you help me do ......" so how can blame them.

Soooo, after that little by myself meeting I got motivated. I have never failed at anything I set out to do so I realized this was just another hurdle I could leap over with hard work. I said a little prayer and as usual asked God "Just do this for me and I promise....". Right after my prayer I remembered that I had posted a form looking for volunteers, so I check the email which was separate from my regular email. To my surprise right there in my in box lay 24 emails with names, emails and phone numbers of people who had read about my event and wanted to help me. 'Thank you God that was quick!!!" i whispered to the ceiling. It was as if i was running up a steep hill in a marathon and just as I told myself I couldn't go any further, I look up and see the finish line flags rising on the horizon...."I can do this"

The next few days I was awe of the complete strangers that came into my office for interviews and all said " I am all yours, what do you need me to do?" I have helped in many ways in my life but I have never just volunteered and showed up to help a stranger, the closest is when I go help friends. I was so grateful and I kept telling everyone to the point where they probably thought I was a tid bit off haha. To cut a long story short out of the 20 about 10 showed up for interviews and 6 of those stood by me till the event was over. They gave me their time and resources without pay or compensation, it was a life changing experience. Right there I decided every other month i would offer a few hours of my time to someone in need. I think we should volunteer a few hours of our time every once in a while. We can't always give money or material things, but we can always give time, skip a movie help children in need every once in a while, you can change your city, community, you can change the world.

Anyway 4 days before the event the production was all in place, we had a great fashion show lined up featuring design work by Micheal Kors, Vera Wang, Giovanni Valentino and my line Bless By Bless Couture. We had models, we had food and we had complimentary drinks but we only had 15 tickets sold. We needed to sell up to 150. I received phone calls of canceling the event, I received calls of hurricane threats for the event date but something told me there was no turning back. No retreat no surrender. Just from the people I had brought together, the sponsors we had walked the streets and solicited I felt we already had reason to celebrate the power of love that a few people had demonstrated. So i was determined to go on with the event even if it meant just having a great time with the volunteers, a few friends and some of my business partners who were helping me.

On the day of the event heavy rains poured but by 9:30 we were almost at capacity. The event went smoothly, people came out in numbers to party and dance in the name of love. It was everything I thought it would be. Although we lacked cash donation from corporate sponsors we received many auction items and sold many tickets. The total amount raised was over $6000. considering we did this in two weeks with just me, my partner and volunteers it was amazing. At first I was concerned with the amount we would raise until I realized the lesson and the unity I had seen from strangers was worth more than the money. I say this because the selfless dedication of these people will raise thousands of dollars and help change lives regardless of when and how.

The event was one of the hardest things I ever had to do. Once I signed on I had the weight of the world on my shoulders. From the two charities that expected money, the sponsors that made contributions and expected exposure, my own expectations for myself and my reputation all hung a heavy cloud of stress above me. I fought and I fought hard and learned so much and that first major charity event will forever be one of my best accomplishments. I say this because all the others will be so much easier and I will have so much more help now that I have shown my capabilities.

Lessons:
1. I will volunteer every few months by giving my time to strangers in need.
2. I will never give up on a dream or goal even when all hope seems lost.
3. I will always have hope and faith that love can overcome all obstacles, any at all!

I thank everyone who helped, attended or sponsored this event, it meant the world to me and I am forever grateful. I love you all!

Bless
Bless By Bless Designer
www.blessbybless.com
Fashion For Life

Here are a few pics of the event. By Photographer Douglas Despres except for the last 5 images by James A. Harding

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Just Let Go....

For as long as I can remember I have a hard time letting things go. From drawings, notes, shoes, clothes to letting go off feelings of hurt or love. I always keep, keep and keep.

Letting go is essential in so many ways in life. One of the best examples I know that illustrate the need to let go is this. Have you ever watched a child playing with a toy and then suddenly they spot a ball or something else that sparks their interest? Most children will do what we all do as adults today, they will try to grab that ball so they have both, the toy and the ball, because mentally you have convinced yourself one is not enough. In the child's case, on most occasions, they will fail to grab both because their hands are too tiny and fragile, so after trying several times they will choose one and be happy with having just the one.

As adults we all have hard times letting go of something we no longer need, or something we know is harming us in some way, so we hold on. Every time I buy a computer to design my clothing on I don't get rid of the old, in case I need it one day and also because I don't remove all my designs and data from it so I cant get rid if it. So I have about 5 computers but I only use one and a half. I do the same thing in relationships I have such a hard time erasing the data and this stunts any growth. By data I mean I have a hard time moving on from disagreements, arguments and other negative things that occur.

Just last week as I finished my catalogue that has been in the making for three years I realized he only way I succeeded to finish was because I removed all the designs that I didn't get a "Wow!" over. I love every single design I create but I had to learn to let some go so I can let the trully strong ones shine.

Here is the cover of my catalogue it should be online in a week or so, please check it out and see my entire collection.



One of the reasons we as people cheat, lie, become selfish, envious, jealous and more is because we are not happy with what we become dissatisfied with what we have and want to reach for more. It is okay to reach for more, but not until you have let go that which is no longer enough.

In the past few days I have reaching deep inside and pulling out the seeds of contempt that I had towards my father for my childhood. I label them contempt because it's not hate, it was more a dislike of the path he chose and still chooses when it comes to being a father. I have been cleaning out the closet and trying to love him with no contempt like I once did when he would let me sit on his lap and pretend to drive. That was just before I turned 6 and he dropped me off at boarding school, forever!

Whether or not I can repair our relationship I don't know, but in life we always want to make sure we show and tell those we love exactly how we feel so they can choose with a full understanding of your position.

Today I let go, or should I say am trying to let go. It's just that easy to start healing...

Hope! Faith! Love!

Bless
www.blessbybless.com

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Still Chasing

It's still Sunday (almost midnight) and I am still working chasing dreams. I am about to finish for the day, I feel I have cleared away some of the heavy cloud of doubt that I wrote of hanging over my head earlier.

In times of true hardship the only medicine for me is to reach to my passions, the things that make me feel at peace within myself. My passions (besides my mother) are writing and designing, when I am sad i can trust exercising either one of those helps me express myself to the point where I realize that I am truly blessed and should be happy with what I have.

After my tough start today I have been designing all day, saying little prayers of hope and talking to my mom (yes I speak out aloud to her and yes she hears me), well at least that's what i believe. I think that officially makes me insane in most people's opinion :) but that's how I survive.

I am very excited about my latest sweat shirt design, I have always been a firm believer in honor, love and mercy, for I think those things make you strong and noble. Dishonor, hate and revenge make you feared but not loved or respected. I rather be loved and respected than feared and hated.

- Honor before Dishonor. Always do the honorable thing, dishonor breeds disgrace.
- Love before Hate. Always choose love over hate, hate is a parasite that eats the hater most.
- Mercy before Revenge. Mercy is mistaken as weak, never revenge it makes you wrong too.

So here is my 1975 HLM (Honor.Love.Mercy) Sweat Shirt Hood


Copyright Bless By Bless Couture 2008

If I didn't have tough days I would never be never motivated to do what I love or what I believe in. So i guess I have to be grateful that things are the way they are, that even the toughest of moments can be used to create light, that we can follow to better days.

Hope! Faith! Love!

Bless

blessbybless.com

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Chasing Dreams

Today is sunday one of my favorite days of the week for a few reasons: 1. I feel like on Sunday's people are a little more laid back and not so on edge. 2. I always work the least on Sunday's, I work 7 days a week ( feels more like 12 days ). 3. My anxiety is at it's lowest because my phone rings less and most of my clients and business associates don't call me for deliverables.

Today however is not a typical Sunday for me, yes I am working but my mind is not at peace,
I feel a deep dark cloud above my spirit, it's so heavy I can almost feel it. Every once in a while I think we all feel like we can no longer take it, we feel we have tried so hard for so long, stayed so strong and yet we feel life is cheating us. We feel life is too unfair, A BIT TOO MUCH TO BEAR!

From the moment I woke up I felt as if I had just lost something I really loved, it feels as if I lost something i cannot replace but I am not sure what it is. Today I am questioning all the hours i spend on my laptop designing, creating, secluded from the outside world. Today I am thinking of how hard it is to chase dreams, how easy it is to get lost chasing your dream. Sometimes we begin chasing our dreams and then we run right past them running after an imaginary ghost that looks like our dream.

I have always dreamed of being re-united with my mother and yet for that to happen I had so many goals I had to accomplish first, so both her and I could be re-united in a happy comfortable life. It brings tears to my eyes that I haven't seen her in almost 8 years, it pains me and weighs really heavy on my heart. All the help I try to give her, the 2 hour phone calls cannot compare to how I could re-awaken her spirit if she saw me again. The last time I saw her she wiped the tears from my eyes as I said good-bye and told me "Don't cry, I will see you soon" and now 8 years have passed. At this very moment I would give up everything I have worked so hard for just to look into her eyes and watch her laugh like she always does when she sees me or hears my voice on the phone.

We all make sacrifices in life so we can get what we want or help those we love, I have made many sacrifices in my life, the biggest was leaving my home to live in a foreign place where I didn't know a soul, so I could help myself and those I love. Today however I have a heavy heart and a heavy feeling that I have run so hard after my dream I went by it. So today I am turning around to retrace my foot steps, I am going to remember that the ones I love and that love me, are the reason I chase my dream.

I am a big believer in chasing dreams, for in our darkest moments that's all we have and that's what gives us the power to have hope that we can rise and turn a dream into reality. I have watched many of my dreams come to reality and I still have many more but as I chase them I must remember not to run so fast that I don't experience the love, beauty and blessings that my life already has.

As you chase your dream remember to stop every few miles and; gaze at the flowers, listen to the birds make music, make a child laugh, give a friend a hand, thank God for all you have, be grateful, make a new friend, listen to other's needs and spend time with those you love the most. For one day you will catch your dream and look around and you will be alone or you will forever chase a ghost and run past all that matters.

I love you and miss you Annastasia.

Hope, Faith & Love!

Bless
www.blessbybless.com

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What Do You Stand For?

It's Thursday and my head hurts, another one of my grueling days at the office where I spend at least 13 hours of my day, lately more like 24.

I saw a newspaper ad earlier that stated "What We Stand For", so in retrospect I asked myself,
'What Do I Stand For?". Strangely enough I had to think about that, what do i stand for? A question we should all ask ourselves ever so often to make sure we are fighting for what we represent and what we love.

So I Started to write a list and I wanted to share it on my blog. By the way I am very excited that I have been getting so many emails from people with comments or asking when I was posting a new one :). How flattering! Thanks to everyone who reads my blogs.

Anyway enough of my a$* kissing haha, no seriously, here it is:

I Stand For Love

I wake up each day wishing I could do everything with, wishing I could look at everyone with love, that would make me such a better person. Today a man begging on Newbury Street for spare change annoyed me, he continually yelled "can you help me out man!". Annoyed I ignored him, but right after I realized what is he wasn't going to spend it on drugs, what if he really needed to eat. Even if he was a drug abuser does that make him any less of a man than me? I went back outside and he was gone, but I am sure I will see him again and when I do I will look at him with love, even if I don't give him a dime, just love. For a human being to resort to lowering themselves to the ground and begging it speaks of an unquestionable surrendering of ones will to fight for yourself, so drug addict or not I feel for any homeless person.

I Stand For Equality

I stand for fairness in all aspects of life. I have been in positions where how I looked, what I represented or just for no reason, I was not treated with respect or fairness. I remember when i was 12 years old my family and I took a trip to South Africa for a vacation. We had been driving for about 8 hours plus with no meal so we decided to pull over at a restaurant. Besides stopping for gas this was our first stop since coming into the country, so we were all very excited, not mention "food!".

There was about 12 of us in the Volkswagen Minibus and yes all immediate family haha. Anyway, we walked into the lobby of the restaurant and all of sudden the clatter of shiny knives, forks, the tings of wines glasses and the voices of diners speaking over the next table immediately stopped!!! It was as if someone had just shot a gun and threatened to shoot anyone who dared to move.

So the host comes round his podium and whispers to my father, I didn't know what words were exchanged but father nodded quietly and next thing I know we were back sitting in the minibus. "We can only buy take-out" he said, "everybody we are getting burgers?". The explanation behind the whole situation is people of my skin color were not allowed to dine in at that restaurant. How sad, the saddest thing was how we all accepted it, yes because are a pretty passive family, but also because it wasn't that much of a surprise. Also sadly, this was in 1988 roughly, one would think this happened in 1967.

So yes I stand for equality, no person no matter how rich, how educated, how smart, how talented, how beautiful is better than me, NO ONE! In the same way I am not better than any person no matter how poor, how uneducated, physically unattractive or mentally challenged they are. Those who think and act as if they are better than the rest are usually stuck up and wondering why they are alone. Those who think others are better than them or that they are inadequate are usually insecure and victims of the self proclaimed "better". Many people may have better talents, better jobs, better looks or even better lives but as people we are all the same. I stand for equality!!!

I Stand For Serenity
I am serene in most situations. Even if someone scares me from behind me, or a real frightening part in a horror movie I remain serene, but inside however, I freak out, but you could never tell.

Serenity stops us from saying things we will regret only a few minutes later. We all get caught in the heat of the moment, we will swear, insult, degrade or some cases physically act out, "it's only natural" most say. Mmmmm i don't really agree. Many times in life we get used to calling each other names, cussing, verbally or physically abusing each other and it acceptable becaus we were upset.

I think serenity shows true love and respect for someone, when you can be so upset but still look at that person and respect them as a human being is so powerful. Most times we hurt each other in life we do it unintentionally, we do it from our own short comings, our own weaknesses and not from a desire to hurt another person. So with that in mind it's only right to be understanding, to stay calm and poised and not say regretful things, to be serene.

The best part of being serene is that staying calm and collected reduces our own stress, so in the worst situation if we are able to stay together we do ourselves the best favor. I look around and there is so much anxiety, stress and anger and like they say "90% of the things we worry about or irrelevant" to our future.

I Stand For Hope & Faith

I will keep this one simple, anything in life can be achieved or overcome with hope and faith. Like the Bible says, we only need faith the size of a mustard seed, so in other words faith is so powerful we don't need much at all. No matter what religion you are I think you will find that faith and hope are important in life.

When I boarded a plane in Zimbabwe to a destination 12810 kilometers all alone barely 18, i had hope and I had faith that no matter what came my way I would overcome. We do so many things out of faith in our everyday life but it is automated so we don't realize how much we really have and if only we had a little more or applied the faith that we already had to our goals, our relationships, our jobs and our beliefs. Something as quick as crossing the street requires faith and hope. We have faith and hope we will make it across, so we do it without even thinking, on cell phones, on bikes, laughing and even in between cars. Imagine if we had that confidence in our relationships: faith to let go and be ourselves, faith to know what relationships to walk out of because we know we can do better, faith to know we will make it and find true love , and easily too.

Enough said I stand for faith because it makes things possible, its faith that I am here writing this blog on a computer, a lucky little boy from Mutoko Zimbabwe. To give you an idea here is a photo that could of been me as a kid, it actually is a pic from Mutoko.


This photo is of kids in Mutoko, actual place I grew up. It's by a great photographer named Ernst Schade Website: www.ernstschade.com I love his work.

Anyways faith can take us places, just look in the mirror and realize that you were once a thought, then that thought turned into hope, then that hope was backed by faith between a man and a woman that they could create a beautiful child, and there you are now, a manifestation of hope and faith.

There are many more things I stand for but I am out of time and I think you are too in this busy world, get to work!!!

Oh! Oh! I Stand for many more other things like ice cream, whipped cream, mango and shortbread cookies but I wont get into that :)

"What Do You Stand For?" What ever it is fight to represent it more each day,
and just maybe one day we will all be perfect hehe.

Hope! Faith! Love!

www.blessbybless.com

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Simplicity: A Curse In Disguise ( water is life )

A few minutes ago I was thirsty and thought to myself: do I walk next door to the Poland Springs cooler and get a cup of water or, do i go buy a shaken iced tea from Starbucks downstairs from my office. A common debate I go through more than 4 times a day, after all we are supposed to drink 8 glasses of water a day.

While sipping my shaken iced tea with cream i pulled out my phone card and called my mom.
She answers the phone in a low dragged out "hahlooow", she usually sounds like that when she is half asleep or if something is bothering her, but it was neither this time, she cheers right up knowing it was me :)

She hears me sucking the tea through the big wide straw and asks what i am drinking and I tell her tea. She then tells me how she is so tired because she just spent the last few hours filling
buckets with water before the city shut it off the water supply, they only turn it on for two hours a day, mostly 4am - 6am. For those who don't know my mother lives in Zimbabwe.

Okay let me get to the point.

When I am thirsty i am confronted by many choices
1. What do I want to drink?
2. Where do i get it from?
3. How much of it do I want?
4. Can i put whipped cream on it?
5. With or without ice?

I could go on with all the choices I have to make. Now I will switch the scenario to choices I was once confronted with when I would visit my mother as a child, a scenario some of my relatives still live in today. Bear with me I know this is getting long.

1. There is no tap to turn on, no running water, no Starbucks and no hallway water cooler.
2. There are no flavors to choose, no whipped cream options & no barista to serve you
3. The is no refrigerator to walk to, no ice tray and no convenient store with bottled water.

Thats is such a tough situation even to imagine.

My life today is simple, when I am thirsty I get up and go and get something to drink. I remember picking up empty 10 gallon tins that once had cooking oil, but were now water buckets and walking a few miles to the well with my mother. To me it was fun because I knew after a few days I would return to my father where we had water, bath tubs, refrigerators, soda pops and more, but to my mother this was survival. Once at the well we would wait in line make small talk with other villagers who were also filling up their water buckets. The first time I went to the well I was horrified I looked into the well to fill my small bucket and I saw "things"swimming in the water, tadpoles and other little "things". I squirmed and looked at my mother who laughed and told me "get out the way spoiled brat!". The trip back to her huts was not as fun carrying the full bucket.

So when I was thirsty I would take a cup and scoop water out of this bucket, always looking in the cup as I drank in case a tadpole swam into my mouth. I know the word "gross" is crossing some of your minds. When it was time to bath there was no shower or bath tub, I would take another trip to the well and heat the water on a fire. Then I would carry the bucket into a little roofless bamboo hut, lather my towel with soap, wash my whole body then rinse myself off scooping water from the bucket with my scooped hands. My favorite part was when I was done and there was still some warm water in the bucket, I would pick it up and pour it over my head, aaaaah!

Many of my friends and relatives live that life today, my mother wakes up every morning at 4am when the city turns the water on for two hours, to fill up her water buckets - gues that's better than when she used to walk to the well. Then she goes back to bed and wakes up with enough water to water her greens, bathe, and cook for the rest of the day. I on the other hand don't drink tap water, it tastes bad, the news says it has traces of drugs, it's not cold enough and so on and so on!!!

Life is so simple when I am hungry I eat, thirsty I drink, tired I sleep in a comfortable bed and yet I find myself stressed out over so many little things, when all I need I have.

We all have so much yet we all claim we have nothing, feel we have nothing. Being born in such a simple life where it's almost like we have a remote control to everything, we never have to think of not having anything. Simplicity is a curse I feel, it takes away from knowing what life really is, what we have and what it means. Simplicity disguises everything we are supposed to be grateful for.

Today I thank God for the tea I just drank, I am grateful that I had the option to have ice in it, to have cream, to have sugar. I remember waking up to milk my mom's cow for milk in our breakfast tea. Some days we would be late and the cow would have no milk because the calf would of go to it before us, so tea would be black and there wasn't a gas station or convenient store down the street.

Be thankful for water today, defy simplicity ( that disguises what we have) and rejoice in the blessings that flow through taps, stores and bottles everyday.

Bless
www.blessbybless.com

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Never Be Comfortable

It is 1:33 am and I just decided to create and post my very first blog. I always thought blogs were for people with too much time on their hands, or people who had problems to vent. Today I realized a blog is simply someone with a voice. From today this blog is my voice.

Today felt like no special day for me, it was just another Monday, it was rainy and the sun didn't really shine. Now that the day is over I realize how special it really was. Yesterday I got news that my cousin had passed, she was only in her 20's and was lying dead in her room for two days. So stepping out of today's self absorbed cloud of unappreciative thinking I realize the following:

My life is beautiful, I have so many things to smile about, today's rain was beautiful not gloomy - it was water ( I love water ), my walk to the train was humbling not depressing, the people on the train were not strangers they were fathers, daughters, mothers, sisters, brothers, they were just like me, they dream and want the same things as me. I realized how fragile this all is, i realized that I am blessed because I have so many people who love me, that I would never lay dead in a room for two days undiscovered. I wonder about her last thoughts, her last fight for breath or maybe she didn't fight, I wonder what she felt and I wonder if she is no longer in pain.

I have decided to design a "this beautiful life" shirt in appreciation of everyday I draw breath. So as I launch my new clothing line I am truly grateful for the gift of life we all take for granted until it's too late.

Today be grateful, your life may not seem grateful but look again!


Rest in peace Priscilla Changachirere & Taryn Leonard beautiful lives that ended way too soon.

Bless
www.blessbybless.com

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